First Date Top 10 Tips!!!!

A first date is always a nerve racking situation but if you stay calm, look your best and act normal all should go well. But since many people rarely go on dates now a days, a lot of people don't know how to act. Over the years, I have learned the do's and don'ts to dating through my own or other people's experiences.
Here's my top ten first date tips......

Tip #1
Be prepared for your time:
A lot people don't understand that it's some prep work before a first date. So you have to allow yourself enough time to get home to change/bathe/apply make up/etc, get to the location and get there on time...

Tip #2
Get to your date early:
You want to get there early because maybe it's a spot you've never been before so you need to check out the surroundings. Maybe they don't have valet, you need to take the train to the location, find parking, traffic, etc. You don't want to have your date waiting. Nor do you want to be so frustrated by all the unplanned events before your date.

Tip #3
Greet your date properly:
Depending on you all status or what you'll allow, greet your date accordingly. Since it's the first date in this situation, you may want to give a person a handshake or hug. Something like a kiss off the break sends signals that you want something else. So be careful how you greet that person.

Tip #4
Depending on your status is how you interact with you date:
Don't allow a person to reach over and try to grab your privates while you all are out or even in the car. A woman should act like a lady and a man should act like a perfect gentleman. There shouldn't be any unnecessary touching in any form. If the guy want to touch your knee during the movie or you want to interlock arms also, depending how you feel, it's all up to you. Remember a man will treat you the way you allow him to.

Tip #5
Stop flirting so much!!!:
It's cute to let a person know that you really digging them and want to show them in all ways possible that you're physically attracted to them but when all clothes are on, you really need to get to know this person. Get to the bottom of things. Ask questions pertaining to their goals, family, friends, experiences, children, career,etc. Get to know the person, not what they can do for you.

Tip #6
Allow a man to be a man!:
This is hard for a lot "independent" women now a days but let the man to lead the date. I'm not saying allow him to lead you right to his house, NO! I'm saying stop telling the man what you want and what you all are going to do. You make that man feel like he's out with a controlling woman and loose interest. Allow him to ask you what you want to do next and where do you feel comfortable going. But stop being so "independent", that's why your butt is single! LOL

Tip #7
Do NOT GET DRUNK ON YOUR FIRST DATE!!:
This is so sad that I have to insert this tip but boy oh boy I tell ya, a lot of people get out here and show their ass because they don't know how to act. The feel as though the alcoholic beverage is going to "calm their nerves" but really it shows your ass! You need a sober and clear mind to make the right decisions, to enjoy the date and for the date to really enjoy you. No person want the first impression to be that they either can handle their drink or they're an alcoholic.

Tip #8
Body Language is everything during a date!!:
A person can tell if you're really diggin them or you're clearly not interested based on your body language. Your body shows a person how much you're enjoying the conversation by the raise of the eyebrows, the lean in of the body, the gentle touch on the hand, the look up from a drink, a smile, laughterand a gentle tap. All those there tell a person that they can pursue you further or simply end the date early. Remember not all people like to be touched though.

Tip #9
Fellas, for the first date pay for the meal:
It's very traditional for a man to pay for a meal. Women was raised to let a man spoil you and show you much they appreciate you and this goes hand and hand with a first date. Not saying that you have to go all out and splurge on this woman but show her that you're not cheap and you have no problem paying for activities of the first date.

Tip #10
End the date properly:
This is the nervous part of the date....to kiss or not to kiss?? This is simply all up to you! I can not answer this question for you. Again this depends on your status, your body language, and how you want to end the date. So choose wisely, don't end up in no one's bed...you may not get to see what the future holds.

SO GET OUT AND DATE!!!

Thoughts to Paper: Journalling

I've started journalling at the tender age of eleven. Like most children that start at the age, you mostly write about whats going on in your life irrevelant. Myself, I wrote about who's house I went over, what we did, what I did for the weekend with my parents and the little snotty boys that I liked. To this date, I have three journals that I have filled in with my random thoughs and experiences. Now those three are in the attic collecting dust. But from time to time I do go back and read what I wrote. It's always an excellent thing to go back and remind yourself how far you have come. What lessons you have learned and what you gained from it all. I usually do this a year after the last journal entry in the previous journal. It's simply a time to reflect and encourage myself.

When I tell people that I journal, they always ask me what do I write about? Its kind of hard to explain but I most likely give them examples. I see journalling as another outlet for me to get to my thoughts out. It's my friend without judgement. They only person who will ever judge me is me. A lot of times I listen to people's problems day in and day out and give advice when asked but then when it's time for me to let go of how I'm really feeling, no one seems to be around or really paying attention to a word I am saying. Therefore, I let my ink bleed on the papers, sometimes along with tears. Yes, tears. I can't count how many times I had to stop and allow myself to get myself together because I have had so much built up anger and/or hurt suppressed inside of me. I hurt just like any other human being or animal but somehow some people don't see it.

As years progessed on, my writing has become extensive. My poetry is an exentsion of my thoughts but more on an intimate level. Those are differnt types of words that flow through me. Poetry is my inner most vulnerable spot within my soul. Something that many people wont understand (unless you're a poet also). But now my journalling has expaded to other books. I have a personal one where I write down my weekly experiences, lessons, thoughts, goals and feelings. My prayer journal is where I talk to God on a more intimate level. I usually write my prayers down and then speak outloud back to God. I pray about anything that my heart desires, regardless if it's prayers for other people, money, goals, accomplishments/praises, hurt, pain, etc. I let God know how Jamale is really feeling. I don't hold back at all to God. He is the only one who knows me the best, so why fake it?

Lastly, I have an exercise/diet journal. Now this is new, since I just brought it this past week but I have journalled about this in the past, I just did it in another form but it's all the same. This journal has the date, current weight, meals, feelings and thoughts. I use to write all this stuff down in my personal journal but I'm glad to see that they finally have it where I can keep up with it separately. Thank you God! This journal is going to help me A LOT with my weight problems. Unlike, some people, I can admit when I'm wrong. And right now, my weight is all wrong. This is an area in my life that I don't like and that I need to work. Therefore, I believe this journal will open up myself in a different way and reveal to me my problems with loosing weight.

I express all this to say, don't be afarid to write. I use to be afriaid to really put down on those pages what was really going on with me in fear of someone judging me later. But I later discovered that the only person who was getting hurt was me. I don't care what people think nor do I care how they may view me once I depart from this earth. I just pray that people will understand that I made my share of mistakes and I have learned from them. So if my children read from them, they too will learn what not to do. Or even if my journals fall in the hands of a stranger, I pray that they live their life to the fullest as I'm trying to live mines. So if you're reading this and don't have a journal, go out and try it. Allow yourself to be comfortable enough to fully let go of what's bothering you. I pray that you see what's really eating you up inside. Peace and blessings...

Nail Polish Color of the Week

*Cheshire* by Funky Fingers

Hair Maintainence

Hello Young World!

During my hiaitus I was approached by two women to their hair. Now this was a complete shock for me but God is good for allowing me to have that oppurtunity to do something like that. I've been doing my mom's hair maintainence for the past three months since our hair dresser had dissed her for her last hair appointment back in June 2010. I took it upon myself to learn new hair styles via Youtube since both my mom and I aren't getting our hair done by her for a while. Since doing so, I've learned about four hairstyles to do on my own hair. Now I've been growing my locs for the past 4.5 years so my hair is significally longer and thicker than my mothers. But that doesn't stop her from wanting the same or similar hair styles that I rock, which is no problem. Therefore, I started doing the styles on her hair. Which is shown below.

My mom's coworker's were so impressed with her hair style that they immediately pulled my mom to the side and asked for my number. I was in shocked! Now this is what you all don't know. These two women go to the same hair stylist that my mom and I were going to. But apparently, she has been doing the same thing to them by cancelling appointments the day of (even 5-10 mins before the appt. time), not returning their phone calls and/or extending their appt. dates. Therefore, they decided they wanted to come over and allow me to do their hair. I was extremely surprised and overwhelmed but I did fine. I took my time and they were satisfied with their results. I didn't get a picture of the first ladies hair but I did of the second lady. Here's the pictures below...

I did a simple basket weave for her and made sure I moisterized her scalp and locs since she has extreme dry hair/scalp. *She came back two weeks later to get some flat twists put in on the side of her head but I forgot to take a pic*

Nail Color Of the Week

Hello Everyone!

I'm continuing my weekly color of Funky Fingers and this week's color is.....

Power Play by Funky Fingers

Hair Maintainence/Nail Polish Color of the Week

Hello everyone!

Sorry I've haven't shown yall what my nail colors and hair styles has been for the past 2-3 weeks. I've been super busy with taking a summer class. Anyway, the following pics are for the past month of July. For my hair, I mostly like my hair in bantu knots or pin ups so it's mostly curly. Lastly, my nails I love bright colors for the hot occasion so thats what I've been rocking! Let me know what yall think!!! Have a blessed one......

Last week's color was: Funky Fingers South Hampton Seafoam

Last Week's Hair Style: Bantu Knots with larger Bantu Knots in the front

*it was flat twisted in the front then big bantu knots the ends but I forgot to take a pic of it. But this is the flat look later in the week.*This week for my hair I just did two strand twists then twisted those two strands into a huge bantu knots. It just gave a wavy/curly look. Nothing too different than the previous picture.

This week's nail color: L.A Colors Magnectic Force

This color surprised me how bright it was once the sun hit it. It's actually an organge/peachy color so this is what it looks like while I was driving....

Hope you enjoyed!!!

Nail Color of The Week!

Hello People!!
My nail color of the week isn't posted in my last nail polish post because I brought it afterwards. I was going into the beauty supply store to get some shampoo and conditioner and then BAM I saw this beautiful color!!! Anyway, hopefully yall will enjoy it.

Barbie Pink by KleanColors

Nail Color of the Week

Hello everyone! My nail color of the week is......

Mint Apple by Sinful Colors

My Trip to the Beauty Supply Store....

So today I went to the beauty supply store and got some nail polish and eye shadows (my favs!). I came out with a steal so I wanted to share them with you. I'm debating which one I wanted to pick for the nail polish color of the week...so we shall see. Enjoy!

Left to Right:

Klencolor~Blue Pearl

Sinful Colors~Soul Mate

Sinful Colors~Mint Apple

Wild and Crazy~Larousse

Middle:

La Color~Magnetic Force

La Colors~Static Electricity

Front:

Tri Eyeshadow by NYX~

Shangri-La

NYX~ Red Head

Facial Care

Over the past 5 months, I must say my face has done a complete 360! I've always been the type that didn't have many acne problems nor pimples. If I did have one or two, I'll just simply wash my face more and keep my hands away from my face. But recently, this haven't been working for me.

Around March 2010, I've been experiencing more outbreaks, black/white heads and acne scars. I FREAK OUT!!! My body wants to wait until I'm 27 yrs. old to just do it's own thing! It's a little embarrassing for anyone to break out with a pimple but to continuously get them is getting beyond embarrassed. In fact, you become a little self conscious. Not because it's a pimple or little bumps but you're wondering "Are they looking at my eyes or the pimple on my forehead?" No one wants to have that feeling.

Therefore, I took it upon myself to try out some other alternatives to my skin care. I was using Ambi Daily Facial Scrub and that worked great. But the only thing I didn't like about the product is that it leaves behind a film on my skin. So I had to use my Astringent to remove that, otherwise, my face felt "heavy" in a way. Along with the facial wash, I was using Ambi's Facial Moisturizer. Now what I'm really feeling is that the "black products" are now putting SPF in the formulas. A lot of people of color don't realize that we too can hurt our skin by constant wear and tear in the sun.

Again, around March 2010, my face wasn't liking this product, and decided that it wanted to break out. I asked a good girlfriend of mines, a recommend facial wash that she likes, used or have heard work really well. She then told me how she came upon a facial wash that our mutual friend left over her house. She showed me the bottle and I immediately went out and brought the product. (I was tired of these little bumps on my face!!!) So I went out and brought the Biore' Pore Unclogging Scrub. This cleanser was great! It immediately (within the week) cleared up my face. On the front of it said that it's better than Proactiv. Now I don't know because I never used Proactiv but I must say I was impressed!

So I decided that I needed to change my moisterizer too because like my Ambi cleanser, my moisterizer came to an end. I didn't know that Biore' had three different lines of facial regiems. But I came across the Biore' Skin Preservation. Whats different about this is it's a moisterizer and a spf 30!!! This moisterizer saved my life. LOL. But it's a very refreshing feeling moisterizer and keeps my skin pretty.

Along with my Biore' facial wash and moisterizer, I decided that I wanted to try some other products of theirs. I haven't done much trying because my skin is very sensitive but I have tried the Deep Cleansing Pore Strips. These strips focus on the areas of your nose and under your eyes. It uplifts those horrible white/blackheads that linger in your pores. It's very easy to use. Just a matter of watering your nose area, apply the strip, and leave on for 10-15 mins. Then wooo-lah, you have fantasic skin! Now I was using them once a week and then I had to stop because I was breaking out. Not because of the product but due to my sensitive skin, I was overusing the product and it was drying out my skin. So I would recommend you using it once a month. Unless, you have hard core skin and you don't mind the dryness around your nose area, knock yourself out! LOL. I really like this product though. So I'll continue to use it. I can see the difference in my face.

Now something thats different between my face and yours, is that I have a combination skin type. Therefore, in the morning my face can be dry-normal but by the end of the evening, my face is oily as hell!!! It simply can look like I have thrown a lot of oil on my face and my pimples isn't a great background either. So I had to wash my face in the evenings so I won't get anymore bacteria and pimples on my face. But I needed also needed to get rid of those past acne scars aka hyperpigmentation. Those are the worst for people of color!!! I'm sometime a picker of my pimples (yea I know it's bad!!) but you have to understand no one wants to walk around with a huge pimple on their chin/forehead/cheeck,etc. So sometimes I'll bust them. Therefore, it'll leave scars later. So I didn't want to have a clear face and a lot of dark pigmentations on my skin. So I googled and Youtubed how I can get rid of them and I came across this...

Yep thats what it is, sugar and lemon! I thought "what will this little concocktion going to do for my face??" Women on Youtube swear by it! I saw it many years ago ask a nautural exfloxiation but not as a hyperpigmentation treatment. So since many women lived by these simple natrual grown products, I said I'll try it. So mid-April, I stared using the lemon/sugar scrub. At first, it burned like hell!!! Yes the lemon was penetrating my pores but thats a good thing. It was getting those areas where I had those dark spots (mostly on my left cheeck). The women do it either everyday, once a week or once a month. Myself, I use it 2-3 times a week in subsitute for my nightly cleasner (the Biore'). It really makes your skin look and feel great! See God put things here for us to use naturally, it's just a matter of using them.

Now usually afterwards, my senstive skin shows its true colors and is dying to for some moisterinzing. But before I do that, depending on the day, I use two different masks. I came across a mint mask (CVS brand of Queen Helene's Mint Mask) for those stubborn pores that were open, allowing the bacteria to enter. This is suppose to srink my pores and refresh my face. I usually use this mask twice a week, Tues and Thurs. It's a really cool sensation and I can feel my pores literally srinking. LOL. I know it sounds weird but it works for me. I'm happy with the results. Now on the other days, Mon, Wed, and Frid., I'll do another mask to whiten up those hyperpigmentation marks or to srink my pimples. The Mario Badescu Whiting Mask....... This mask isn't bad either. At first, I was soley using this before the mint mask. My only problem with the product is, I have a white film left on my face. I sorta look like a clown once I'm finished washing my face. No matter the water temperature I use to wash my face, the product is still on my face. Each mask I usually leave on for like 10 mins, where the mint mask come off with no problem but the Mario Badecsu is a lot of washing off. It works to srink my pimples but as far as whiting, I really don't know since I'm using the lemon/suguar scrub along with both masks. I don't think I'm going to buy this product again because of the left over white film. Other than that, I have no complaints about the product and I plan to use it up.

Lastly, I changed my astringent and nightly moisterizer. I was using Sea Breeze Sensitve Skin Astringent and Ponds Dry Skin Cream but they weren't working for me. The Sea Breeze was a little harsh for my skin. So I needed to change it to Witch Hazel or find an astringent with Witch Hazel in it. Witch Hazel is a natural toner, that evens out the hyperpigmentation along with cleansing your pores. So I stubbled upon a astringent that has both witch hazel and is a toner, which is Olay's Refreshing Toner.

Funny thing is, it actually smells good and it doesn't dry up my skin like the other astringents did. As you can see, I've been using it up quite a bit and I'm satisfied with the product. I use astringent more in the summer time than in winter because of the weather. As a result of the heat, my skin gets more oily in the summer than in the winter. In the winter, my skin is thristy for moisterizer so I only use astringent once a day in the winter. Like I said previously, my skin is oily as hell at the end of the day in the summer. So the astringent helps even out the hyperpigmentation plus tame that oil. Lastly, for a nightly moisterizer, I use Bio Oil (I have the CVS brand). This skin treatment is suppose to even out those acne scars, stretch marks and moisterize dry skin. Pefect for me!
This oil gives my skin the enough moisture needed after a long day for sun, heat and abuse. I usually apply it before bed but I dont go to sleep right after the application. The reason why not because it'll greese up my pillows! You have to allow time to penetrate your deeper layers of skin. Really rub the oil into your skin and you'll be fine. It leaves my face refresh for the morning!

Nail Color of the Week

Hello People!

This is this weeks' Nail color. Enjoy!!

Flying Dragon (Neon)

Nail Polish Color of the Week

Hey People! Happy December! I know I haven't done this in a while but I need to go back to show you guys my nails. Yes I still do polish them, I do my toenails more than I do my finger nails though. LOL. But anyway, my nail polish color of the week is called Black Cherry by Milan. Enjoy!

Video

When I first saw this def poetry video, I cried! I know alot of you probably thinking I'm crazy as hell but I'm dead serious! I felt the same pain and spoke the same words as her. I haven't seen this video in years but it came to my mind to go find it on YouTube so I wanted to share this with you all. This video is dedicated to all those who have loved and lost! Enjoy!

What's your type Ma?

When some of my friends or women that hardly know me ask me what type of men I like, I simply reply that I don't have one. A lot of people think I'm lying about something as simple as my type of men I like but to be honest, I have never put the much emphasis on my "typical" man I would talk to.

All my life, I always dated or been with men that are beautiful in their own way, never no one whom you couldn't say was cute. I'm not trying to sound vain but I do need something nice to look at. :-). When I try to show some of my female friends the type of men I dated, they can't believe how different my range of men have been. I've mostly only dated black men but I have dated Spanish men before also. All of them touch me in one way or another. But what really amuses me is that when I show some of those men I talked to before, some of the women ask "Girl, where did you meet him at" or "Damn." But the way they say it, is like they can't believe how a "girl like me" can manage to cop a man like that. See women like that I have to clearly stay away from.

Those type of women are what you clearly consider a HATER. They will try to either get with his closest friend or sadly your man. Thankfully, I haven't had to deal with such fuckery. I manage to gain men based on being just me, Jamale! A lot of women don't look past the physical because we're always trying to compare ourselves to the next chick. I was guilty at one point in time doing the same thing. You'll see one sexy specimen of a man and wonder what the hell does he see in that fooly wolfgang woman of his. WOMEN STOP THIS THINKING! We have to be open minded enough to understand that man see something beautiful or special in that woman. Especially if he has children with her. I know I especially had to stop that thinking because maybe that's how other women was looking at me with those men. I am far from perfect but I do deserve to be happy with my man!!!

Back at the point at hand, my range of men vary. I've dated light skin, red bone, mixed, true black/blue, brown, caramel complexed men. Tall or short. Pretty teeth or crooked as a crook teeth. Or even the chubby ones. I believe you should really enjoy a great personality! That's what all my men had in common, a personality. The physical attribute is always a plus but that isn't the number one key characteristic that you need to rely on. All the men I've dated made me laugh, smile and feel special.

A woman wants to of course feel special, comfortable, and most importantly wanted. Even if I didn't get all those in one, I did enjoy it while it lasted regardless of the outcome. Every situation and relationship is a lesson learned. Trust me I've learned A LOT plus I'm still learning.

Now don't get me wrong, there are some physical attributes that I find sexy as hell! Such as pretty teeth, a wonderful smile, bedroom eyes, height, MUSCLES, tattoos and hygiene. But sometimes those things aren't always in that package that I received but I accept NO EXCEPTIONS for hygiene!!! I refused to date a nasty ass man!!! LOL. Boys will be boys but boo I NEED A MAN! So with all this being said, I'm officially saying I love them all. Sexiness come in all races and personalities!!

Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

Color of the Week

Sorry you guys that I haven't been updating you all about my nail polish of the week. I have been painting my nails but I've been too lazy of putting them up on the blog. I'll make sure I'll paint them again over the summer and post them. But for this week my nail color is.......

Ruby Pumps by China Glaze

Now I'm really scared/shy about wearing Red because people use to always tell me that dark skin black women dont look right wearing red polish and lip stick. So this is a BIG step for me. People say I look fine but it's still something that I have to get use to....what do you all think???

Nail Color of the Week

Hello Bloggers!

Nail Polish of the week is................

China Glaze's:

*For Audrey*

St. Patty's Day Nails/Nail Color of the Week!

Hello Bloggers!!!!!!!!

So for this week, I switched it up just a little. I wanted to celebrate my "hidden" Irish in me so I wanted to paint my nails a bright green. I went to Sally's Beauty to pick up a green that I saw before that caught my eye. I decided to get China Glaze's "In the Lime Light (Neon)." I also came across these nail art decors that will be great to try so I said what the hell, for shits and giggles let me try them. And I must say, with a little patience and perseverance I was able to do the damn thing! My coworkers loved the green (since that was the brightest thing on me b/c I wore all black) and they always compliment me on how "patient" I am doing my nails every week. Below are some of the pics I took for St. Patty's Day. Enjoy!

China Glaze:

In the Lime Light (Neon)

My Nail art that I used for my ringer and index fingers

For the remainder of the week, I was suppose to wear China Glaze's Awakening but when I brought the Neon green, I also came across this beautiful Purple that I had to put on my nail beds. So I'm going to rock this for the week/weekend and go back to my spring colors. Stay tuned for the "Tiffany Blue" color next week! Enjoy!

China Glaze:
Panic Purple (Neon)

*My room didn't give the color true justice so here's a better look @ the color!*

Nails

This is my nail color of the week that I said I will be updating you guys with. Enjoy!

China Glaze:

*Rich and Famous*

Next Week I'll be doing something with Green so I can "celebrate" the Irish in me. LOL. TTFN

My Loc Journey

Photobucket Album

My new ADDICTION!!!

Hello Bloggers!

I have offically became addicted to China Glaze nail polish! I know, I know, I'm late but to me this is a big step. I usually get all excited about men, Coach bags, cars, and clothes but never over nail polish. About three years ago, I use to paint my nails every week but I found that too hard to maintain since I was working in an GYN office and I washed my hands every 5 mins! LOL
So now that I don't have to keep them in water so much, I can keep up this habit. ;-)

Over the past week or two, Sally's Beauty store was having a fabolous sale on China Glaze nail polish and I just couldnt resist $3.69 compared to orginal price of $5.99. So thanks Sally's for your lovely sale to start off my bad habit! LOL. I just wanted to share my mini collection compared to some bloggers that I've seen already. Also I wanted to show how some of the colors looked on me so far and I must say I'm loving it! I believe I'm going to put up a pic a week of the colors that I applied to my nails. This is something new for me to do so enjoy, comment, hate or leave it! *Hugs*

~PoeticMind~

*My China Glaze Collection*




*Spontaneous*






*Sexy in the City*


Another View of:
*Sexy in the City*