Sunday, March 29, 2009

Anticipation


My movements become slow and seductive as I walk towards you as you sit there and anticipate my next move. I swing my hips because I know you're watching. As I proceed to climb on top of this mountain, you stop me to warn me of the fact that I'm about to cause a natural eruption that can not be controlled. I laugh at the thought as I continue to climb aboard. The impatience on both ends are now about to show. We both race to see who can undress quicker. You play with my emotions as you're now trying to go slow and read my face. That don't last long when I begin to tug with the little bit of clothes you have left. Damn we've both waited for this moment which is finally here. I back up from the scene when that thought come to mind. I begin to smile and attack again.



Written 2/23/05

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Why I DON'T Want to Raise my Children in the Nation's Capitol

I've come to the conclusion over the past six months, that my mind is maturing faster than my body. Seriously, that may sound a little arrogant but I swear to you it's the truth. I've been raised amongst a generation who believed in respect, love and admiration. They loved one another, their family, friends, job and life but now a days things aren't the same.

My parents are true Washingtonians along with my brothers and I. My parents were born in the late 50's but they are true 70's offsprings. They told/tell me stories all the time how they could sit outside on the stoop with their neighborhood peers and just talk, go to clubs and actually have a good time with being in fear of their lives, and how they had friends who happen to fall in love with the drug game, regardless if they were selling or using end up died, still struggling or in jail. I've learned from their stories and their music. I enjoyed my Saturdays waking up early (sometimes) and cleaning the house with some old Phyllis Hyman, Bloodstone, The Moments, Blue Magic, Whitney Houston, The Whispers, etc. just to name a few. Their music intregied me. I'm a person with a fine tuned ear for a good beat and excellent lyrics and thats what they had it back then. They love and they loved hard. They didn't disrespect themselves or their lovers for a dollor sign. Based on my parents upbringings they molded me to be the person I am today. Yes, I did do some rebellion and smart tounges were thrown here and there but I always have respected the struggle my parents came from. Based on those morals and rules I abdied, I learned that life isn't easy and you will have more down's than up's.



Everyday when I get on the train headed back home. My peace, my santuary, my world away from the world, I have to go through hell just to get there. I find myself everyday shaking my head at some teenage girl popping her mouth, loudly at some girl that ran her mouth wrongly to her. Some little boys smoking cigarettes when they don't even have a lick of hair on their face yet. Another black young boy "speaking his mind" with curse words that pierce my soul everytime I walk past them. Speak your mind with out curse words young sirs. Fore if all you can speak with is with curse words, then you really don't have much to say. I tell myself all the time that I'm glad that I'm not in school anymore. It actually does hurt me deep inside to see my youth, my peers, my culture is slowly going down the stony road to ignorance. I know when I was in school (8 yrs. ago) we had more respect for our elders and for one another. We wouldn't dare speak curse words to or around any elder, for that a cause for you to get your mouth slipt by one of their children. When we fought one another, we didn't jump into other people fights, we let them fight fairly. No guns, knives, razor blades or any other weapons. Once we saw it was getting out of control, we had to stop it. But NOT anymore!



Our youth is not being taught by our familes and commuity but by the streets. The streets have always been there but since the 80's and early 90's the streets had mentors, programs and the community to come in to help raise our children. Hence, I was a product of those times. I'm a true 80's baby and proud of it. My community and elders also helped raised me. Whenever I said or did something that was inappropriate, my parents was immediately told. They hardly had any problems with me becasue I never followed crowds but I did go through a phase where I hung around the "in crowd." Thank God I realized that I didn't feel comfortable around that particular crowd because if I was the one to follow it, maybe I would have been one of those kids that I'm blogging about now. Funny.......



The children today are more focused on cars, clothes and the opposite/same sex. They're always trying to live in life in the fast lane, wear the flyiest clothes, feel welcomed so they'll try something new sexually. Word of advice, it's not cute to keep up with fashion, thats why this economy is so F'ed up now. We're so busy trying to keep up with other contries that we can't even pay our debts to other countries, feed our poor, get the homeless off the street and most importantly give every US citizen free health insurance. Like Malcolm X father told his mother, "Credit is the first step into debt and back into slavery." People didn't see it as that until the numbers fell last year. You are now a slave to your own debt. Stop letting money control you and you control money! How do you think the rich get rich and stay rich? Think about. Cars are a good thing but not when you treat your car better than your family or friends. I know someone who washes, cleans, get check up's on their car more than they do for their own health. Ask yourself this once the car is gone, who/what do you have now? Nobody but Jesus...LOL. Lastly, the fade of trying another sexual lifestyle is your business BUT remember it's your true prefence. Don't try it just because your friends are doing it. This isn't a game to be played. The LTGB lifestyle is a lifestyle that they didn't choose. They are who they are. They don't have to go out and flaunt what they already know. If you are the person that God has put forth among this Earth, than be who he made you to be. Don't follow crowds, be a square and don't fit into cirlces. You end up dying inside.....



I simply don't want to children to be raised around such ingorance. I don't want them to experience the harshness of the blind. I want my children to have the oppurtunity to life well beyond their peers in their ambitions. I want them to of course have a life better than what I lived. I have the choice in my hand how to raise my children properly because I wasn't a product of being raised by a child. My parents were adults when they had me. They taught me right and wrong ways of doing things, speak your mind and love your family more but secondly under God. I appreciate the time that I have spent here being a Washingtonian but I want my children to have a better outlook on life. I know I will be stern, non judgemental and loving to them. I don't want them to ever have to want to be like the most "prettiest" girl in school or the flyiest guy in his class. I will teach them how to love and respect, enjoy life to the fullest and love God above all things. I want my kids to become the next Langston Hughes, W.E.B Dubois, Marian Anderson, Malcolm X, Martin Luther King Jr. and now Barack Obama. I want my children to be leaders in their own class! Lead one, teach one. Heal one, help one. Make their mama proud!



What happened to the historic Nation's Capitol?

Monday, March 23, 2009

Nail Color of the Week


Hello Bloggers!

Nail Polish of the week is................

China Glaze's:

*For Audrey*

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

St. Patty's Day Nails/Nail Color of the Week!

Hello Bloggers!!!!!!!!

So for this week, I switched it up just a little. I wanted to celebrate my "hidden" Irish in me so I wanted to paint my nails a bright green. I went to Sally's Beauty to pick up a green that I saw before that caught my eye. I decided to get China Glaze's "In the Lime Light (Neon)." I also came across these nail art decors that will be great to try so I said what the hell, for shits and giggles let me try them. And I must say, with a little patience and perseverance I was able to do the damn thing! My coworkers loved the green (since that was the brightest thing on me b/c I wore all black) and they always compliment me on how "patient" I am doing my nails every week. Below are some of the pics I took for St. Patty's Day. Enjoy!





China Glaze:
In the Lime Light (Neon)





My Nail art that I used for my ringer and index fingers

For the remainder of the week, I was suppose to wear China Glaze's Awakening but when I brought the Neon green, I also came across this beautiful Purple that I had to put on my nail beds. So I'm going to rock this for the week/weekend and go back to my spring colors. Stay tuned for the "Tiffany Blue" color next week! Enjoy!





China Glaze:
Panic Purple (Neon)


*My room didn't give the color true justice so here's a better look @ the color!*





Thursday, March 12, 2009

Does it really say F*ck me on my Forehead???


So today while catching the Metro home I happen to run across this nice, fine, light skin black man that I thought made my day but before I tell you this story of mines, let me explain my day. Today was filled with plenty of laughs, walking and boredom. At work sometimes I feel like I'm not being challenged and I need a new scence. But today was a good day! I was chatting with my coworker about her recent birthday gift to Match.com that I gave her. I was telling her how our old coworker was asking me why I don't open up a Match.com member page myself since I don't have a man also? Well to answer that truthfully, I always seem to meet the nastiest, unbelieveable men so why bother. Plus I'm leaving my "husband search" up to God. So with all that being said, the Metro is the last place I would think to come across a cutie.





While transfering trains, I was doozing off to daydream land when this guy stood next to me and asked me am I interested in buy some Betty Boo material. While trying to put my IPod on pause, he asked me again. I polietly told him that I wasn't interested. He was like "ok cool, what about socks? I have all types with Bett Boo on them." So I again proceeded to tell him no thanks. Then he say to me "you cute as hell, do you have a boyfriend?" I smile and say well no. Then the conversation goes like this:

Guy: Oh well since you don't have a boyfriend, do you mind if I could call you sometime?
Me: Oh nah, sure.
He then pulls out his phone *thinks* and say: Do you have a pen?
Me: Nah
I look at him a little puzzled like why don't you just put my number in your phone? Plus should I really give this guy my number since he is selling Betty Boo bags in the Metro? But I said hell I know of some people that have full time jobs, they just sell things to get a little extra money plus my younger brother tells me that I'm too harsh on men because I've been hurt in the past. So needless to say I have a "little" chip on my shoulder aka I don't tolerate NO shit!!!! But I said let me be nice. Moving on...so I pull out my planner and tell him oh I do have a pen and for him to write down his number.
Guy: oh go ahead and write down your number.
Me: oh my bad ok
Guy: so what are you doing tonight?
Me: Go home and sleep, I'm a little tired
While I'm writing my number down, he's telling me how cute and sexy I am to him. All while he's licking his lips....
Guy: oh so you just got off work huh? Awww we should go to the movies or something tonite?
Me: Nah not tonite, I'm going home. Maybe this weekend?
I passed him my paper with my number on it and tell him the proper way to say my name........
Guy: Oh damn *shakes his head* I'll be working this weekend......
This is when I look down at his bag and wonder if he's talking about selling those damn bags and then I look up and smile back at him
Me:Oh well call me and maybe we can work something out
Guy: Yea weekends I work and I also have a girlfriend so we would have to go out during the week, ya know?......


*STOP THE TRACK* This is when I look at him with my face wrinkled and eyebrows arced up, staring at him like he lost his damn mind!!!!!!!!

Guy: Yea so we will have to see what we can work out
I'm still in shock like damn this nigga really just asked me for my number and a date but he clearly has a girlfriend???? THE AUDACITY OF THIS MAN!!!!!!!!
Me:ummmmmm yea ok *confused face*
Guy: Ok I'll call you sexy
Me: Yea ok *rolls eyes*

By this time I'm in so much shock I couldn't even tell him to give me the paper back and forget that conversation that we just had. As I could do is stand there and stare off into space and question myself; DOES IT REALLY SAY COME F*CK ME BECAUSE I HAVE LOW SELF ESTEEM TO THE POINT I'LL ALLOW ANYTHING, ANY MAN GIVES ME. Well let me answer that HELLS TO THE MUTHPHUCKIN NAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Sorry for the cursing but these are my exact thoughts). When my train finally came, I stood in the doorway waiting for the door closed and watched my stupidity stare me back into my face while I looked into the door windows of the subway car. The whole ride home I was like damn did that really just happen?? I don't understand somethings? How do you think it's ok to get another girl number when you clearly have a girlfriend? Plus you probably have a numerous amount of kids! Plus do you think that because you're cute that I'll bend to be and stay that boo boo the fool???? Again hell to the nah! I have too much self esteem and pride for that bullsh!t.

This is a prime example of why I'm so selective of who I talk to. My brother can say I'm acting like a b!tch or too manly but damn that! One thing for sure and two things for certain, I will not fall for anything! When I have that first conversation with a guy, I always ask him five questions. They are as follows:
1. Living situation
2.Occupation (better be legal)
3. Kids (if so how many and how many baby mothers)
4. Dreams and aspirations
5. Have you slept with a man or plan to sleep with a man? ( I don't play that sh!t......NEXT!)

I can see now I'm going to have to add 2 more....:
6. Do you have a car? ( We both can be taking Metro sir)
7. Do you have a girlfriend??????????????

WTF????????

This is a damn shame that I have to be a mini detective to get a decent man now a days. Lord why do you keep bringing these nasty, freaked out, inconsiderate, rude, arroganat men in my life? I'm tired of seeing the male gential through text, email or in person! ( Nice to look at but not all the damn time!!!!!) I'm not some female that dream and is constantly in NEED of some d!ck! So please save your size and pleasure principle for the next freak. That's not what I'm looking for. I don't understand it. Does it really say F*ck me on my forehead??






BTW: I will not be taking that guy's phone call!





Monday, March 9, 2009

Nails

This is my nail color of the week that I said I will be updating you guys with. Enjoy!
China Glaze:
*Rich and Famous*
Next Week I'll be doing something with Green so I can "celebrate" the Irish in me. LOL. TTFN


Thursday, March 5, 2009

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

My new ADDICTION!!!

Hello Bloggers!

I have offically became addicted to China Glaze nail polish! I know, I know, I'm late but to me this is a big step. I usually get all excited about men, Coach bags, cars, and clothes but never over nail polish. About three years ago, I use to paint my nails every week but I found that too hard to maintain since I was working in an GYN office and I washed my hands every 5 mins! LOL
So now that I don't have to keep them in water so much, I can keep up this habit. ;-)

Over the past week or two, Sally's Beauty store was having a fabolous sale on China Glaze nail polish and I just couldnt resist $3.69 compared to orginal price of $5.99. So thanks Sally's for your lovely sale to start off my bad habit! LOL. I just wanted to share my mini collection compared to some bloggers that I've seen already. Also I wanted to show how some of the colors looked on me so far and I must say I'm loving it! I believe I'm going to put up a pic a week of the colors that I applied to my nails. This is something new for me to do so enjoy, comment, hate or leave it! *Hugs*

~PoeticMind~




*My China Glaze Collection*





*Spontaneous*






*Sexy in the City*


Another View of:
*Sexy in the City*


Monday, March 2, 2009

*Hugs*

Hug: to clasp tightly in the arms, especially with affection; embrace.

Hugs are something so simple but meaningful. I'm pretty sure a lot of people take advantage and really don't care about hugs but when you further your thinking, you will see it's quite amazing! Hugs are ocassionally something that people do to say a friendly hello, nice meeting you, I miss you or nice seeing you again. But a hug can also mean other things such as damn I'm really attracted to you, this will be my only way to get closer to this person, I don't want to ever let you go or I miss the feeling of you/smell of you. Hugs are universal!


To me, hugs are what the defintion is, to clasp tightly in the arms, especially affection; embrace. When I hug someone I want them to know that I care for them, love them and truly want them to feel my love pour out my soul into theirs. For a long time my ex-boyfriend use to tell me when I kissed and huged him he could tell that I actually did love him by the way I kissed him so softly and deeply and huged him with such passion. I didn't understand what he was saying, I just thought he was trippin because he was in love but now I get it. I realized what he was talking about when I started hugging other people. I would get the fake "grandma" hugs with the pats on the back, that crap right there got me heated! If you have deep feelings, respect or admiration for that person you would take them into an embrace and show them how you feel. Don't hug a person like you don't want to be bothered or you just trying to tickle their fancy.


My best friend hugged me last week and gave me one of the worst hugs and I told him to get off me. I immediately pushed him away and told him if he's not going to hug me right then don't touch me at all! Yes people I was in my feelings! Right afterwards he did make it up to me by giving me a great "see you later" hug while we departed to our seperate residences. A hug can make a simple day great, a bad day amazily sweet and a shy person open up. It's the quick pick me upper that can settle any negative feelings if applied correctly. Sometimes when hugging it doesn't hurt to whisper in that person's ear and tell them how you really feel. Love them, take in that moment for it's a sec in time where you will implant that memory in your subconscience.


My point being is embrace with love and affection or don't hug at all!