This past year has a true year of change. Not just change for myself but also change for our African American culture. Over the past three years I've observed what "our" men has become. They're not the men of Martin Luther, Malcolm, Marshall, or W.E.B but they're the products of the pimps on the corner, the "part time" hustler that seem to have everything that we could possilbly "want" or they're the ultatimite porn star that you could ever fathum. Where are our real men??? Now don't get me wrong, I still love my men but I'm just a little confused? I'm confused about how some of our men can say they love their mothers and sisters, aunts and grandmother but with that same mouth they can turn around and call the next women who won't give them their numbers, a Bitch??? Where are we heading to; a path of destruction, abuse and haterated?
I've had my past of relationships where I loved and wanted but now all I discover is men who want a special pleasure along with that "love". I was reading in the September 2008 issuse of "Today's Black Woman" about my love style. Now this researcher by the name of John Lee discovered what the word "love" meant to a variety of different people. He concluded that there's six different ways how people view "love". You can read on your own the six different types of of ways people view them but mines is called EROS. Now this is suppose to mean love of beauty. It states, "This love style is focused around the sensual side of love, choosing partners using intution and instinct over logic or analysis. Erotic lovers are the most likely to "fall in love at first sight" and are more likely to use pet names like "honey" or "sweetheart." Erotic lovers are hopeless romantics, for whom relationships are simply one long honeymoon. Prone on naivete' and sentimentality, erotic lovers tent to live in a fantasy world and can be more vulnerable because of this. Yet they can make deeply intense and passionate lovers."
Now when read that I was like WOW that really does describe the type of person I am. But am I really living in a "fantasy" world?? Well more and more everyday it seems like I am. I guess you can say I'm still in waiting mode for the man to come and love me for me and sweep me off my feet. I'm waiting for the dreamlover to come and rescue me like Mariah Carey said. I've kissed alot of frogs to finally say I'm wiping my hands of that dream. I'm not in denial nor am I bitter but I am mad as hell! I'm mad at how our African American men are sleeping around with everyone they could possilbly get, spreading diseases, making more babies than they can claim and name, and saying I love you and don't really mean it!!! Yes I know I'm finally just a hopeless romantic that's in love with love but where is that strong man that can handle any situation? I've come across alot of weak men. Regardless if their weak in conversation, sex, financial stability, personality or judement. They're lacking the key potentials of what our past ansectors were. They were men of intergurity, pride and pose.
I fear for our future. What are our men today teaching their sons? Dislike their mothers and girlfriends, abuse every woman that you can by having sex with her and treating her as just piece of a$$, and every word out your mouth is a curse word because you can't think of a better "souding" word otherthan "FUCK"! If this is what we are striving towards then my god, I believe we're on the right track. LOL. Honestly, I'm not mad at my African American men but I want us to love again. Love one another and respect each other as one. When it all come down to it, like Jill Scott said what if we (black women) were poof; every black women in the world disappers, then what? How would you like that then? Our generation will end to be honest. So if you claim you love your Queen then why do you treat everyone as one of Mike Vick's dogs?
Again over the past year, I've been observing our African American men as a changing race who hates, constanly disrepect and put down his own race into shame. Why are you in love with the light skin/red bone, long hair, light eye, big booty girls that really are paying you no attention? I know they deserve love too, but if that is only what you seek, then you're not getting far in this world with that mind set...
I've had my past of relationships where I loved and wanted but now all I discover is men who want a special pleasure along with that "love". I was reading in the September 2008 issuse of "Today's Black Woman" about my love style. Now this researcher by the name of John Lee discovered what the word "love" meant to a variety of different people. He concluded that there's six different ways how people view "love". You can read on your own the six different types of of ways people view them but mines is called EROS. Now this is suppose to mean love of beauty. It states, "This love style is focused around the sensual side of love, choosing partners using intution and instinct over logic or analysis. Erotic lovers are the most likely to "fall in love at first sight" and are more likely to use pet names like "honey" or "sweetheart." Erotic lovers are hopeless romantics, for whom relationships are simply one long honeymoon. Prone on naivete' and sentimentality, erotic lovers tent to live in a fantasy world and can be more vulnerable because of this. Yet they can make deeply intense and passionate lovers."
Now when read that I was like WOW that really does describe the type of person I am. But am I really living in a "fantasy" world?? Well more and more everyday it seems like I am. I guess you can say I'm still in waiting mode for the man to come and love me for me and sweep me off my feet. I'm waiting for the dreamlover to come and rescue me like Mariah Carey said. I've kissed alot of frogs to finally say I'm wiping my hands of that dream. I'm not in denial nor am I bitter but I am mad as hell! I'm mad at how our African American men are sleeping around with everyone they could possilbly get, spreading diseases, making more babies than they can claim and name, and saying I love you and don't really mean it!!! Yes I know I'm finally just a hopeless romantic that's in love with love but where is that strong man that can handle any situation? I've come across alot of weak men. Regardless if their weak in conversation, sex, financial stability, personality or judement. They're lacking the key potentials of what our past ansectors were. They were men of intergurity, pride and pose.
I fear for our future. What are our men today teaching their sons? Dislike their mothers and girlfriends, abuse every woman that you can by having sex with her and treating her as just piece of a$$, and every word out your mouth is a curse word because you can't think of a better "souding" word otherthan "FUCK"! If this is what we are striving towards then my god, I believe we're on the right track. LOL. Honestly, I'm not mad at my African American men but I want us to love again. Love one another and respect each other as one. When it all come down to it, like Jill Scott said what if we (black women) were poof; every black women in the world disappers, then what? How would you like that then? Our generation will end to be honest. So if you claim you love your Queen then why do you treat everyone as one of Mike Vick's dogs?
Again over the past year, I've been observing our African American men as a changing race who hates, constanly disrepect and put down his own race into shame. Why are you in love with the light skin/red bone, long hair, light eye, big booty girls that really are paying you no attention? I know they deserve love too, but if that is only what you seek, then you're not getting far in this world with that mind set...
4 comments:
Thanx for sharing but I'm puzzled.
Is it a crime for an African-American man to be in a relationship/in love with a lady of another race other than an African-American lady?
And how do you know if they tribute their attention to such a relationship? I still can't fathom out why you said that.
I never referred our African American man in love with another race. When I stating that they're in love with the light skin/red bone girl, I was referring about the light skin African American woman, not a woman of another race! Now how can I come the the conclusion that they tribute their attention to that type of relationiship, I see it all the time. I talk to alot of African Ameerican men who repeatly tell me that they're "doing them" and they don't have time for no relationship. They simply want to have sex or a causal sexual relationship. If you don't believe me, talk to some men in about that conversation and you will here them say, they love to have more than one woman, have alot of sex with numerous amount of women or better yet they don't want to be tied down.
hey poetic mind, i feel you!! but there are pull and push factors in every situation. what do you think? be objective and address the other side of the coin...our black women!! the strong black men are there, the strong black women are there....just change your world. ttyl...
Socrates, I agree when you say it's a push and pull situation. Well we all have to deal with different situations and people so not the same all the time with each relationship. I'm just going by what I've seen and been through. It's easy for men to say they don't see nothing wrong with the way their thinking but it's affecting both our youth and our African American women. I'm just stating some facts.
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