I AM my Hair!

As a young child I have always had a lot of hair. My mother hated to do my hair because I use to scream for my father and grandmother because I knew they would "save" me from the miserable pain!! Little did I know that I had a lot more years of pain....

I received my first relaxer when I was around the age of five years old. My mom had enough of the natural hair and she couldn't take me screaming at the top of my lungs for help. So she did what all mothers will do, put a chemical in my hair. Now don't get me wrong, a relaxer is probably the best thing invented for those who natural hair is unmanageable but not for my grain of hair!!! My father has some soft, curly hair which don't need much maintenance and well my mom has that thick course hair!!! LOL. That leaves the hybrid (me) to have curly/wavy and thick hair which killed my mother everyday to do.

My first problem with a relaxer when I was around the age of 15(?). I've noticed that my frontal hairline was retreating backwards. I just couldn't believe that my hair was falling out and I was balding around the temples. I cried initially and I was in shocked that this was happening to me. I didn't leave it in too long nor did I do anything extra nor harsh to my hair, sooooooooo why was that happening to me?? Well behold the problem was that years of chemical treatment was tearing up my hair follicles. But that didn't stop me from keep putting in that chemical in my hair. I started putting Sulfur 8 in my hair along with Do Grow products. Needless to say, my hair did grow back and it did quite well.

Throughout college, I was the type of person who always got her hair relaxed every 4-6 weeks like clockwork!!! I wasn't playing when it came to those wavy roots poppin up from the relaxed ends. OH NO SIR!!!! But my hair was still slowly thinning. I did always admire how a girlfriend of mines had her hair done. She started her locking process in 2002(?) and I use to tell her that I was going to loc mines once I finished college. I wasn't quite ready to give up the relaxed hair look for the nappy/kniky routine.

Finally when I reached my graduation day, that was the last time I put a relaxer in my hair, that day was May 21,2005! I told myself that I was dead serious about my hair because it needs to be a reflection of me. No longer do I need to keep that slave mentality that nappy wasn't happy. I was growing spiritually as well as emotionally. I did some research on locs and discovered a tremendous amount of information!! When I started my locking process I was considering my hair "dreads." Little did I know that isn't the correct term to use. (A little history lesson). Dreads are what's considered to the Whites us dreading our hair. In the older days, they believed that us, African Americans hated our hair so we did things to it to conform it to look like theirs. We relaxed it, burned it, twisted it, pulled it, brushed and combed it to make look like we have "good" hair. We all have been victims of tell someone that we have a "good strain of hair. So whites figured that we must dread our hair because of the process that we go through to get it to look straight. Locking is just another process that we do in order to finally just "give up" on our hair. Leading to the term dread bammalocs. Naaaaahhhh I don't dread my hair!

One day after my 23rd birthday, I was in my apartment bathroom looking at my relaxed ends with my overwhelming curly/wavy roots and I was saying to myself I'm ready! I couldn't believe that my hair was so full and beautiful. I was finally ready to leave that relaxed world behind me. The world of relaxers was a thing of the past. Within that past year, I had braids and cornrows to hold down the frizz of my hair growing out of it's relaxed state to being happy nappy. Right there in the bathroom, I cut off all my damn hair! I was left with a little mini bush of hair on top of my head. That was April 2006. I had enough hair to try to put in a small pony tail but something had to be done. I went to the hairdresser that a friend of mine was visiting and she started my locs with two strand twists.

I started my loc journey April 2006 and it's been a tough time I tell ya. At first I was insecure that I cut all my hair off and I looked like a boy. (LOL). So I wore big hooped earrings to hide that fact even though I really didn't look like a boy. After 6 months of locking my hair was becoming unbearable frizzy. It was killing me how all these little strands of hair had a mind of their own!! So I used so many things to keep them down. I did in fact still used products that were good for loc hair and read more about loc maintenance. The hairdresser who initially started my locs didn't know what the heck she was doing!! She put Organic Root Stimulator and gel in my hair which send my hair follicles in a frenzy! I remember coming home from work, running up my apartment steps and diving my head under the kitchen sink to wash out my hair. I saw all the dirt, materials and collection of other things running down the drain as I washed away all that madness. From there on I decided that I was going to do my own hair!

I did in fact maintain my own hair for the first year of my hair. But my father recommended me to this guy he use to work with. The guy did in fact use to have locs but decided to cut them after 16 yrs.!!! His hair reached down all the way above his butt. I remember looking in his portfolio book and see how his beautiful locs flowed and how he manipulated them into whatever style he choose. So I decided to allow him to do my hair. Little did I know that I was setting myself up for failure!!! He did a great job doing different styles and blessing my hair with love every time he did it but he was terrible on pricing and customer relationships. He would come up with different prices every time I would see him, rush me whenever he had another male customer after me (he's gay) and always had "something" to do. He then started doing hair out of his home in DC instead of the shop which was cool for me but then he pulled the last straw for me. He quickly did my hair again when he saw one of his male customers there and then when I asked can I make another hair appointment ahead of time, he told me to "call him and check on it next week." Oh hell nah! Moving ooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnn.....

I resorted to doing my hair at home again! So I did that again for almost 4 months before I was introduced to my current hairdresser. The first day I visited her at the shop, I was hoping that this was it! I was tired of not having someone that was consistent. I needed someone who didn't play games with money, time nor hair. And I must say I'm impressed with her. She is someone who actually have locs, maintain her own and she have numerous amount of clients. I have so many different styles done to my hair and I'm loving it!!! She actually takes her time into perfecting her masterpiece on my head. I've been getting my hair done by her now since March 2007.

During this loc journey I have discovered me. I have discovered that my hair is just some extended follicles, they are a part of me. They are me! My hair is an extension of my soul. I take time and dedication into growing and loving my hair. I still do have people come up to me amazed about how my hair looks because they're so use to seeing how Rasta's loc their hair. One thing that I do agree with the Rasta's is your hair is an extension of your soul. It brings you closer to God the more you grow it. This process have changed me spiritually and emotionally. At one point in time, I was insecure into how my hair will look towards society and my family. My grandmother couldn't stand the fact that I cut off "all my beautiful hair." I told her "Grandma my hair is still beautiful, it's just another form of beauty." Her and different women look at me and try to understand why I gave up the relaxer for nappy happy. I simply smile and remind them that we all didn't come here into the world with relaxers in our hair, a pressing comb on the side nor any products to contine to keep our hair straight.

I'M HAPPY NAPPY!